EP017: Taking the off-ramp
We all have our own unique paths in life. It’s a journey, a journey of discovery, of, when it comes right down to it, learning about ourselves. And in the process, we are constantly reviewing the path we’ve already traveled and wondering, and often worrying, about the path in front of us. Through it all, we do our best to plan a course of action, we craft a direction that includes our hopes and dreams.
But it doesn’t always go per plan. Life has a way of throwing curve balls. You can find yourself suddenly taking an unplanned off-ramp, journeying down side-paths that you had no idea even existed!
That’s what happened to Blair, a young woman who was on her path as a student at the University of Washington. She was getting a business degree with an emphasis on finance.
“Yeah, so I grew up in Kirkland on the east side of Seattle. I lived there my whole life until I moved to the city when I was 25. My first memories are good, you know, family trips. We had a boat growing up, I lived a very, you know, privileged, privileged life.”
Over the last several decades, Seattle residents have become increasingly overwhelmed by the issue of homelessness. Just to the east, across Lake Washington, the cities of Bellevue, Kirkland, and Redmond, have seen far fewer visible symptoms of homelessness, although the issue is there. I wondered how aware Blair was of homelessness while she was growing up in the Kirkland area.
“So we did have our token like few homeless people in Kirkland. Growing up, my mom worked for the Kirkland Downtown Association when I was in elementary school. And so there was a few people that she knew pretty well. I was aware that homelessness existed, but it was on a very, very small scale. And no, there was no actual understanding of how that came to be or why people were living that way. You know, we just had our few people in Kirkland that kind of kept to themselves really just stay out of trouble. And, you know, we're known to the community but it really didn't rise to like the consciousness of people living on the east side to talk about it. I would say the homelessness conversation has entered the chat in on the east side in the last five to 10 years.”
As a youngster Blair worked as a lifeguard in Kirkland and Bellevue. She was interested in recreational therapy and was heading towards that field. At 17 she started working at the Bellevue Aquatics center where they had a therapy pool. She learned to work with folks with special needs and disabilities and found it interesting work.
While pursuing her business degree at the University of Washington and visiting her partner living in Seattle, Blair began to notice those living outside without basic needs being met.
“I think I understood that affordable housing was becoming less of a thing in Seattle. And so I was like, Yeah, we need, you know, more affordable housing. And so I was kind of geared towards low income affordable housing. And then yeah, something started to shift within me. I'd say like my junior, senior year, I had an internship at Attain Housing in Kirkland, which is a transitional housing agency for families. So I was like on the track, but there was definitely some shifts occurring.”
James living homeless in 2017
James after moving into housing in 2021
Blair wasn’t aware of it, at the time, but by opening herself to one person struggling through homelessness, she had just made a shift in her life path. It would have profound implications.
Often, when we see someone reaching out to be of service to someone in need, we can think that that’s all that is happening, that a need is being met. And to be sure, that is happening and it is important and beautiful. But what is often missed, is that in those moments, both people are benefiting.
Blair helped James get into housing and have basic needs met, she helped reconnect him with family, and maybe, most of all, feel loved in the last few years of his life. And James, what he did for Blair was to change her life. He helped her take an off-ramp from the path she was on and in the process she found her voice and her purpose in life.
In talking with Blair, you can hear it in her voice, she wants all of us to take our own off-ramp, to learn that when you come closer to someone struggling, you will find that homelessness is unacceptable in our society.
Peter in 2016
James in 2018
Michael, Daisy, and Blair in 2018
Blair and James at the UW hospital in 2021
Blair at James' Memorial in 2022, showing off her two tattoos in honor of James.